


Uncursed

by WarlockWriter



Category: Supernatural
Genre: And Gabriel being an asshole, Crack, M/M, Really nothing but crack, definitely crack
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-18
Updated: 2019-06-18
Packaged: 2020-05-14 04:26:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 964
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19265869
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WarlockWriter/pseuds/WarlockWriter
Summary: Gabriel doesn't realize he's taking his life into his hands by having sex with Sam. Fortunately, Dean is a good brother and tries to help. It sort of worked?Fills the "Dean Ships Sabriel" and "Powers Go Wonky" squares for the Gabriel SPN Bingo 2019.Many thanks toGabriel_Is_My_Guardian_Angel89for the beta read.





	Uncursed

 

“What the fuck, Gabriel! Didn’t I warn you?"

Dean was furious when he saw Gabriel stumble into the Bunker kitchen. The angel’s hair was mussed, and his face held an expression which could only be described as “well fucked.”

“What, Dean-o? Jealous?”

Dean shook his head. “I’m fine with Cas, you idiot. No. You fucked Sam, didn’t you?”

Gabriel walked to the coffee pot and poured himself a mug, filling it with what looked like half sugar and half coffee. “Yep,” he said with an obscene “pop” of his tongue.

“And you know what Sam’s power is, right? Everyone who fucks him dies!”

Gabriel’s eyes got a little far away, and he smiled. “Oh yes. I definitely _died_ several times last night.”

Dean rolled his eyes. Gabriel obviously did not understand the magnitude of what he had done. “Look, man. I saw where you two were heading, and I’m cool with it. But I’m _not_ going to pick up the pieces after you die. So, I talked to Rowena, and she found a spell that should neutralize Sam’s curse. But she only cast it two days ago, and she said it needed at least a week to work.”

Gabriel downed his coffee in one long gulp. “I’m an archangel, Dean. Stuff like that doesn’t affect me. Don’t worry about it.”

Dean hoped he was right. Because otherwise, he was about to have one seriously unhappy brother.

***

The next week was…interesting as they hopped from hunt to hunt. None of them went smoothly.

The first one was a demon incursion in some no-name Midwestern town. Apparently, there was yet another demon trying to claim the King of Hell title. (Cas was keeping count and announced this was number forty-three.)

The leader was unusually strong, and even Gabriel was having trouble with him. Finally, he managed to restrain it and yelled, “Dean! Stab it.”

“You’re in the way!”

“Stab it through me. You’ve got an angel blade. It can’t hurt me. Much.”

The demon struggled harder, and Dean could see Gabriel almost losing his grip. He ran over and prepared to stab. However, at the last second, he noticed he wasn’t wielding an angel blade. Somehow, he had ended up with Gabriel’s _archangel_ blade!

With an effort that almost threw out his back—was he getting too old for this crap?—he managed to pull his blow. Sam came up behind the demon and killed it with Ruby’s knife.

As soon as all the demons were dead, Dean turned on Gabriel. “What did I tell you?”

“Bit of odd chance is all,” Gabriel said, not seeming too worried.

Two days later, they were on a hunt with Rowena. Dean never was sure exactly what they were hunting, but apparently the only way to kill it was with a powerful curse that rolled back time for the monster, causing it to have never existed.

Of course, Gabriel got caught in the backwash. Fortunately, he was old enough that all the spell did was de-age him to a toddler.

A week later, they were all sick of a cranky toddler Gabe who wouldn’t sleep because the only thing he would eat was candy and he was basically on a perpetual sugar high. Even Sam was fed up with him.

Rowena finally figured out how to reverse the curse, and things (mostly) returned to normal. Although it was a month before Gabe completely stopped the baby talk.

Everyone collapsed in Dean’s Man Cave ™ to watch movies once Gabe was back to normal. Dean should have known better than to propose a horror flick. Because, of course, the monster—something with too many eyes and tentacles—came out of the screen and tried to eat Gabriel.

After it was dead—Dean was sure he was never getting monster ooze out of his favorite chair—Rowena tried to reassure them. “Sam’s curse must be getting weaker, lads. That wasn’t even something that had a hope of killing an angel, much less an archangel.”

Dean regarded his chair sadly. “No. Just my chair.”

***

A week later, nothing else had tried to kill Gabriel. Or rather, several monsters had _tried_ but none of them were even close to powerful enough. Gabriel’s archangel blade stayed where it was supposed to, and nothing else came out of the TV.

Finally, Dean started to relax. When he wasn’t yelling at his brother to “keep it down in there, all right!”

The next morning, Gabriel again stumbled into the kitchen and straight for the coffee. Dean, arm comfortably around Cas, watched him go by.

Properly caffeinated, Gabriel sat across from them with his trademark smirk. “Such a cute couple.”

Dean scowled at him. “Dude! Enough.”

“Brother, you haven’t even thanked Dean for arranging to have Rowena cast the spell to break the curse.” Dean was glad one of the angels in the Bunker had his back.

Gabriel had the decency to look (somewhat) abashed. “You’re right. And I’m sorry.” He raised his hand and snapped his fingers. “There. A new chair for you, Dean. With my compliments.”

Dean got up, eager to see his new chair. “Thanks, Gabe.”

Gabriel walked off, but Dean could just see his smirk. “What?”

“Oh, that last monster was totally me. Sam and I _may_ have christened your chair, and I decided it was a good way to get rid of the evidence.”

Fortunately, Cas was strong enough to hold back Dean. Because right then, Dean was ready to go find Gabe’s blade and stab him himself. Even if it meant dealing with his grieving brother afterwards.

Gabriel’s laughter mocked him all the way down the hall to Sam’s room.

Dean watched him go. Well, at least his brother was happy. That probably made it worth putting up with Gabriel. Maybe...


End file.
